To all who end up reading this, I just want you all to know, I love you. It might be to varying degrees. But it's true regardless. As long as I live, I will love you. And even after I have gone, I will still have loved you. So even if it feels like nobody else does, you have my love, for whatever little that may mean.
I know that you may have those low moments. Filled with regrets over past mistakes. Just know however bad you may have screwed up, you are not as bad of one as I am. And even if you think you have messed up as badly or worse than I did, just know that you can survive. You can get better. You can do better. You already lived through it. You have the regret of having made the mistake, and the pain from having made it will help you learn to avoid making the same mistake again.
And I know from experience. It sucks even worse to repeat the same mistake, especially when it feels so much worse than the last time. But it's okay to not be perfect. It's okay to continuously screw up. You are still trying your best. People have a bad tendency to focus on the single failure, rather than the hundreds upon hundreds of times you succeeded. Every day you don't do the thing you feel guilty for is a day you have succeeded, and I'm willing to bet that's more days than days you do the thing you later regret having done.
You are better than you think you are. I truly believe it. If you can't love yourself, then at least know I will love you, and I won't be alone. You are loved by more than you know. You are appreciated by more than you know. We are all human, we all make mistakes. We are not perfect--so you don't have to be. You are seen, flaws and all, and loved and adored as you.
There will be those who accept you as you are. There will be people who understand you and love you, despite your flaws. Find them, cherish them, and love them back. There will be times you will hurt people, and if you have empathy, you will be hurt yourself. But, all you can really do is your best, try and promote healing, do the best you can to prevent harm and stay positive.
You can make a difference. You can continue to brighten the days of others. Just keep in mind, if what I wrote in any way did this for you, then you can do the same for others--because if I can make a difference, if I can brighten your day, even after all of my myriad of hurtful painful failures and mistakes...you can do the same for others.
Comments