The more productive I am, the more healthy I am mentally.
The less productive I am, the worse I am mentally.
And it is a spiral. Bad mental health causes low productivity, low productivity feeds bad mental health.
I've been dealing with some bad burnout.
I've been dealing with some terrible depression.
I haven't had the energy or time to blog.
I've been unable to really function.
But, today was really good! Yesterday was extra terrible, I had extra frustration with OBS and being unable to get it working, which I need to because Twitch Studio is being discontinued despite it being literally the only streaming platform requiring no third party extensions and was simple intuitive and user-friendly in a way OBS Studio isn't.
And I couldn't.
I couldn't get it working.
I didn't do anything.
And then I got burned out.
I got so burnt out I literally shut down and was unable to get ANYTHING done AT ALL.
Yet today I did the work of two days and have energy to spare.
I didn't get everything I wanted to done, but I'm proud of what I did.
Still...there's definitely a worrying trend in my mental health.
Once I did all of that...
...and I rested...
...I noticed I was not as good mentally as I was before.
So like...the MOMENT I stop working...I don't feel nearly as good.
I need to be working, or sleeping, or I feel terrible.
And that can't be healthy.
But, that doesn't diminish my accomplishments, and I am proud of it.
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