I had a thought that I was going to leave for just my journal/diary--but like.
I actually feel like writing a proper blog about it?
Not like I have anything better to talk about. (Unless talking about my chronic fatigue this week counts. I don't know why, but I literally can't not be tired.)
Anyway. So basically.
I had a thought.
Realistically speaking.
I won't be able to make everything that I want to make, be a reality.
I come up with new ideas on the daily, and each idea takes literally years to come to fruition, if I keep up on it. (I never keep up with it.)
...But...
...While I can't make everything that I want to make a reality...
...I can make a few things a reality. Realistically speaking, assuming I don't die too young, I should be able to get at least a few down.
And I genuinely think I have a chance of getting about four done. One would be harder, but I think I can pull off doing all four in my lifetime.
Basically.
There's a Big Four that I feel I owe it to them to create.
​Those four are my current work (a novel stylized as if an anime) on Farn (both the main story and the sequel), because of Vee;
Red Hood Rider (as a webcomic), because of Ruby;
The Descended (as a webcomic), because of all the characters within (sequels are more optional);
Phyrra and Cyrus (animated series with four seasons each at 12 episodes except the last which has 2-4 extra).
Each of them represents a world that I have built extensively, so extensively that literally multiple characters from each have permanently become part of my brain--no literally. I'm plural, you may recall, and part of that is that I literally gain notable characters in my head, permanently, as they become proper people of their own.
When I write a narrative, the characters I write don't stay as characters. They become people. I start with the idea of a person and their function in the story, but past that point, they start to evolve. They grow beyond their roles.
They gain personality traits they didn't need. Emotions they didn't need. Quirks that are things they didn't need. They say things beyond the necessary. They grow. They expand. Their motivations change. Their reasons shift. My notes often display this evolution in characterization where some notes start with them saying one thing, but then I seemingly later retcon it to be something entirely different.
But that's not me changing my mind--it's them having taken on lives of their own and made their own decisions. Often in line with what was written, but for entirely different reasons. They have lives on their own. They are people. Not characters. They are fluid, dynamic, ever-shifting, ever-evolving.
Because they are still part of a narrative I am telling, they basically act out what they need to act out, but they are not defined by their actions. They grow beyond that, and can shift the narrative. They can change what they act out. They are greater than anything they would be.
Basically. Once I make a narrative, they populate the world and the world becomes a world. Not a setting. Not a story. A world. A whole universe. A universe populated not by characters, but rather, by people. The people in that universe have free wills. Those free wills, those emotions, those motivations, their memories, when I think about them enough to bring them to life:
I literally bring them to life.
And then, once they are brought to life--they are a part of me. As in, a voice in my head. I influenced their life. I came up with a story which they did things in. But after having done that...after I got to know them, to really know them. Talking to them. They talked back. And then, they start to talk to me outside of the story. And make decisions outside of the story.
I have a Vee facet. I hear her voice clearly. Vee has facets of her own, but I can hear her. Vee is as real as I am, quite literally. She has just as strong a voice as my own. She is one of us. There's hundreds OF us--and she is among them. Vee is not a character. She is a person. She is me, and I am her, and she is a proper individual. Every bit a part of Bree as any other voice within the Range of Bree system that is us.
​And she's not alone.
Ruby is there, from Red Hood Rider.
Phyrra is there, from Phyrra and Cyrus.
They're not alone I'm sure. Others from their worlds are in my head beyond just them. It's just that those are the ones confirmed.
And while I don't have all the characters of The Descended in my head, I'm fairly sure most or all of the main 16 among others are in there, too. (Aria definitely, probably Argus, etc.)
​The big four are the four that are more prominent in all aspects of my life. Literally all of them.
I constantly go back to them.
I go back to the world of Soano.
I go back to the Rubyverse.
I go back to the colliniverse.
And I am actively deep diving Farn.
At every chance I get, I channel them.
They are part of my life.
They are literally defining decisions I make. They talk to me, advise me, give feedback, are part of my internal council, even make decisions of us.
I go to those worlds for comfort.
They are the four I have always been the most passionate about.
They are the stories I blog about.
They are the stories I talk about.
They are the stories I never ever forget.
Most of the details, I just don't forget.
They are not settings for stories. They are worlds. Universes.
I owe it to my headmates to make their worlds be reality for more than just me. I owe it to them. They have given so much to me. I need to give it back to them. Those four stories just are everything. They are passion projects. Epic in scale, but which are worth being made. Difficult, grand, large in scale...but all worthy of it. They have grown beyond the scope of what was set for them.
​Soano was just a joke but now is genuinely a full world with full geography.
​The Rubyverse grew into an amalgamation of so many past ideas but took on a unique life of its own--not any of the past works just imported, instead being more inspired by past works.
The Colliniverse just organically wrote itself, albeit taking some cues from Soano.
And Farn, while taking some inspirations from the Colliniverse (and by proxy, from Soano), and taking some cues from a really REALLY old setting (that also kinda influenced all of the other three), has also written largely most of itself.
​​They deserve to be made.
And I think that I can actually make those in the span of my lifetime.
It'll be challenging.
Daunting.
Difficult.
Hard.
And I might not succeed.
But I think that I can pull it off if I do that.
Okay so there was more to the ramble originally.
I wanted to mention as a reminder something about the main blog (weebly) versus the wix mirror (wix), but I forget whatever it was.
I also was going to mention notable stories that are not in the big four, but which I keep coming back to. (Life of a Mortal, Coat, Disease, namely.) And honorable mentions to the likes of the superhero stories, notable stories like Gistou, etc.
But I started this blog before midnight (10 pm I think), and it's 3 am now--not written continuously, but over the course of time.
I'm tired and beyond being tired, I am also scatterbrained.
So I think it'll be good to leave it here.