If not blogging in three weeks wasn't a tipoff, let me make it official.
Physically, mentally, emotionally, I am in shambles right now.
My bipolar disorder's depression has been rearing its ugly head a lot as of late.
My chronic health issues have gotten much much worse as of late.
And then on top of that all, I was in a car crash on Saturday May 13th. And my car got totaled in the process, and I am the one liable for it, and it feels like everything which could go wrong, has.
I'm barely sleeping.
I'm unable to eat much despite knowing I should.
I'm still getting hungry, yet not getting enough food.
I'm not losing weight, though, so that's good, but the fact that I'm not likely means the stress is causing me to keep the weight as fat.
I'm not working out.
It's been weeks since I was on ComicFury.
I'm not staying up to date on discord at all. Literally every server I'm in, I haven't read in days upon days.
I know at one point, I had a thought of, "I've given up on life."
Because these issues build on each other, compounding one another.
My lack of good rest has ruined my freetime.
No free time, no time to get good mental health.
No good mental health, no good physical health.
No good physical health, no good rest.
I just have so much being wrong right now and what I have right is...
...That I'm not failing harder I guess.
I'm sorry I've been so silent.
I'm just...unable to...to exist, pretty much.
​Yet, having no choice but to...is quite the struggle.